Being a 22-year-old, average lady, living in a society, where people expect way more than your capabilities, I have run down the line of scrimmage and finally found myself in agony. I am currently a final year medical student running the ball to meet my own ends and make it up to the final exam. I have also been married since one and a half years.
I have been among people who are so keen about the wedding brigades and fascinating marriage customs that have always drawn the attention of many. Pre-marriage I was one of those who was fascinated by the exemplary embodiment, a person would adopt on the day of marriage and life thereafter. Turning ourselves into a totally new life, with new people was my notion of getting married. Death of dreams and the invisible freedom we apparently enjoyed was my another take on marriage.
This blog post is gonna talk to you about what I have thought the marriage ceremony in my place is like. Let me tell you this is just my own personal opinion and it may vary from yours. And let me tell you this is how arranged marriages work.
The girl growing up in a family is more like inviting people to discuss her future plans and marriage and I seriously have no idea why people are so much interested in other’s affairs when their own one doesn’t go that well. ( I do agree that the same thing can happen with guys as well, but girls are usually the softest targets). She reaches 20 and people are like, ”this is the perfect time for you to get married and you can study after that, what is the big deal. This is for your better future. After the age of 21, your skin would start wrinkling and you would not look as charming as you are now. It would be difficult to get a groom thereafter .” ( and probably none of them are gonna be your future, it’s you alone and whatever Allah will’s for you). Hunting for a perfect groom is what some people do and some would be for not so perfect guy. And the girl, she is in between the dreams of her career and happiness to her parents. She is convinced that she can always pursue her dreams even if she gets married and that is always the first ever promise that she hears( this promise may or may not be kept, it depends on people)
A perfect groom is finally ready for her. Engagement, wedding planning, places to be arranged and all that stuff is all that you hear in the next few days. Wedding, Party, and all things are planned.
Now comes the bride part. All the planning usually happens without the bride herself because it’s not always convenient to take a girl ’s opinion in everything and girls cannot have a choice in everything that is happening. Girls are convinced that she is getting married for her betterment and nothing is done to harm her and nothing goes against her will. ( another word may or may not be kept, it’s usually a grey area)
Let me tell you a few comments a girl would get to hear 👂 around her marriage. Do not put yourself down but this is what happens at times ( not always ) . Skin color, beauty, pimples, spectacles or no ( meaning the girl have good eyesight or no ), the loudness of her voice, behavior, the number of times she smiles( meaning she is interested or she has another relationship), and the list goes on. Girls break their head in between being underdressed or overdressed on her engagement day or the so-called big day of her life and finally end up wearing something that everyone except the girl herself agrees to .(That was way more exaggerated 😜).
Bridal wears, ornaments come to her as jokers clown and yet she looks perfect and pretty in her smile, may be from the heart or just a curve that is worn on her face. This is just the drama part of marriages. I have heard people saying that the day of your wedding is the biggest day of your life, but mine was honestly the worst day of my life for a number of reasons. The drama would get over in a way a short time and you would be left numb not keeping the pace of the time that has just passed.
Now let me tell you something good. To all the pretty and beautiful girls out there, marriages are neither a new beginning nor the end of your dreams. It is just a part of your life. You have played a lot of roles in your life. Schooling, college, graduation, artist, athlete and so on. Marriage is just one simple part of it and the flow have to continue. Marriages are like two people on a journey planning to go together just to make the journey more easier and enjoyable, not to stop 🚫 one of the people halfway. You just walk both of your dreams together and make it up for both of you. So your journey isn’t stopping anywhere to have a new beginning, it’s just continuing but you have a person to hold to if you are tired. Marriages are that simple.
Please note 🔣: This may not be a piece of inspiration, but the hardest reality that I have faced and just thought of sharing it.
Thank you for 📖.